I saw that a humble man with the blessing of the Lord might live on a little, and that where the heart was set of greatness, success in business did not satisfy the craving, but that in common with an increase of wealth the desire of wealth increased. There was a care on my mind to so pass my time as to things outward that nothing might hinder me from the most steady attention to the voice of the True Shepherd.
I find that to be a fool as to worldly wisdom and commit my cause to God, not fearing to offend men who take offense at the simplicity of Truth, is the only way to remain unmoved at the sentiments of others.
Where people let loose their minds after love of outward things and are more engaged in pursuing the profits and seeking the friendships of this world than to be inwardly acquainted with the way of true peace, such walk in a vain shadow while the true comfort of life is wanting. Their examples are often hurtful to others, and their treasures thus collected do many times prove dangerous to their children.
It was my concern from day to day to say neither more nor less than what the spirit of truth opened to me, being jealous over myself lest I should say anything to make my testimony look agreeable to that mind in people which is not obedient to the cross of Christ.
I was then carried in spirit to the mines, where poor oppressed people were digging rich treasures for those called Christians, and heard them blaspheme the name of Christ, at which I was grieved, for his name was precious. Then I was informed that these heathens were told that those who oppressed them were the followers of Christ, and they said among themselves, "If Christ directed them to use us in this way, then Christ is a cruel tyrant." (pp. 230-233)
I delight to do your will, O my God,I am grateful for John Woolman who showed such a great combination of inward concern and sincerity mixed with an outward concern for his neighbors that reached out to humanity. He was instrumental in getting Quakers in the American colonies free from slave-holding years before the United States was even formed.
your law is written within my heart. (Psalm 40:8)
I have not been this way, but I am moving in that direction by God's grace. I am quite concerned with inner integrity and consistency. Such concern has moved me outward more and more into loving my neighbors. I understand that my neighbors consist of my own family, primarily. They are the one who are the most "nigh" to me.
From there I have been learning that my love can extend to community. They are also "nigh" to me, even if not in the same way and intensity as my family. I have often viewed people outside my immediate family and friends as more threats than neighbors. Although "seeking friendships of this world," as Woolman puts it, can be a problem if it is done with the goal of seeking comfort in this life alone, loving my neighbor is different. What has helped me is realizing that for peace and comfort personally and in my family, it is more important to love others that to be loved by others. Community functions from church to school to civic events present themselves as places and times in which I have the privilege and opportunity to love my neighbor.
Recently, I have been working this out in church. I have been going and allowing myself to "waste time" for God, just being with the people there and serving them regardless of the outcome. It reminds me of when I was teaching my children how to eat well. I did not make them eat things they did not like, but did push them to try and retry things. One distinction I gave them was that there was a difference between eating things that aren't your favorite things to eat versus eating things that are repugnant. I excused them from eating things only that were repugnant and that they had tried a number of times. Some things have "grown" on them, especially when they see there are benefits to eating other than just tasting and consuming. The taste for salad came as they learned how good it is for them and as they found ways of making salad palatable and even good-tasting. For me, I am often at a place when I go to church because it is good for me, even if it's not one of my favorite activities, I believe I will learn to have a taste for a number of things as I practice going and loving my neighbor.
Such love is best given humbly. I have found that Woolman's advice on moderating his business concerns and his comments to others to be helpful: "Pass my time as to things outward [so] that nothing might hinder me from the most steady attention to the voice of the True Shepherd" and "Say neither more nor less than what the spirit of truth opened to me." I have found that refusing some opportunities for promotion of honor have helped tremendously in allowing time for inward transformation. I have found that I have a tendency to try to speak on things that I do not know or understand while I easily pass over speaking to things that God has prepared me for. Something of pride impels this. Pride is made of moments of pretending, presuming, and pushing.
When thinking of slavery that Woolman fought, his vision of those oppressed by "Christians" is alarming. When given power or say over certain things, I see how important it is "to act justly and love mercy." (Micah 6:8) These are the areas I need to begin with. Certainly this begins with my own body and life and those in my family, but it does not stop there. I have been given "say" over more than that, so I have responsibility in other areas as well. I see that the kind of effort I have used to think and act as Jesus would if he were me and had my family, I need to use in other areas of my life as well. Work, church, community, nation, and world.
I'm afraid I have let my voice be heard only through voting, which is private and often ambiguous. I have avoided times and places which might ask me to speak and act in community or work as I have been learning to speak and act at home or with personal acquaintances and friends. I have not allowed my heart to drive me out into the broader world because I have little hope for the place and a lot of antipathy from fear.
This will not do, of course, because Jesus himself went out into the world and took his disciples there. Jesus' inward power and reality of life were released in a public ministry of teaching and helping and healing for the benefit of making disciples who would become as he is. Public ministry - working for and with the people "out there" - is the means by which the inner teaching and encouragement from Jesus becomes solid and real for myself and my family.
Lord, I believe that I have been saying less than what the spirit of truth has opened to me. I have been silent when I should have spoken. I believe that I have avoided outward work not so much to protect my relationship with you and my family, but because of fear and anger at the world you loved so much that you sent Jesus to die for it. What can I say? Forgive me. Help me to grow as a person who will give not only a good family and good work to society, but also truth and help and real self-sacrifice as you lead, Father. Let my compassion be both inward and outward. Amen.
There will be many people who blaspheme the name of Christ unfairly and largely due to their own hardness. But I want to prevent anyone from misusing the name of Jesus because I have supported - whether silently or vocally, whether through activity or inactivity - hurtful or misleading ideas and movements. I see that this "protection" is at the heart of some of the more aggressive and forceful ministries. People can see themselves as "protecting" the Bible and truth from becoming misused and emptied and "saving" people from thinking that Jesus has no help or power or real truth. Also, people can see themselves as "protecting" the oppressed and afflicted by fighting for their rights as human beings created in God's image. Such fighting can be as destructive as it is good if it is performed out of pride rather than humility or out of a sense of self-righteousness rather than love. It is as outward form of "compassion" without the inward reality. I want to be like John Woolman, who seemed to balance such considerations and tirelessly worked to free people from lies and oppression. May God grant me mercy and grace.
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