Compassion Flows Through Laws

Devotional Classics, William Temple, Excerpts from Christianity and Social Order

The method of the Church's impact upon society at large should be twofold.  First, the Church must announce Christian principles and point out where the existing social order is in conflict with them.  Second, it must the pass on to Christian citizens, acting in their civic capacities, the task of reshaping the existing order in closer conformity to the principles.

This is a point of first-rate importance, and it is frequently misunderstood.  If Christianity is true at all, it is a truth of universal application.

The Church is likely to be attacked from both sides if it does its duty.  It will be told that it has become "political" when it has merely stated its principles and pointed out when they have been breached.  The Church will be told by advocates of particular policies that is is futile because it does not support theirs.  If the Church is faithful to its commission, it will ignore both sets of complaints and continue as far as it can to influence all citizens and permeate both parties.

We are dealing with Original Sin, the least popular of traditional Christianity.  It may be expressed in simple terms as follows: Our standard of value is the way things affect us.  Each of us takes our place in the center of our own world. . . .  Education may make my self-centeredness less disastrous by widening my horizons.  But this is like climbing a tower which widens the horizons of my vision while leaving me still the center of reference.  The only way to deliver me from my self-centeredness is by winning my entire heart's devotion, the total allegiance of my will to God - and this can only be done by the Divine Love of God disclosed by Christ in his life and death.

Part of the task of the Church is to help people to order their lives in order to lead them to what they ought to be.  Assuming they are already as they ought to be always leads to disaster. . . .  Although Christianity supplies no ideal [society], it does supply something of far more value, anmely, preinciples on which we can begin to act in every possible situation.

Our true value is not what we are worth in ourselves, but what we are worth to God, and that worth is bestowed upon us by the utterly gratuitous love of God. . . .  The State exists for its citizens, not the citizens for the State.  But neither must we treat ourselves, or conduct our lives, as if we were ourselves the center of our own value.  We are not our own ends.  Our value is our worth to God, and our end is "to glorify God and enjoy him forever."

We must be treated as we actually are but always with a view to what in God's purpose we are destined to become.  For the law, the social order, is our schoolmaster to bring us to Christ. (pp. 223-227)

Do you wish to have no fear of the authority?  Then do what is good, and you will receive approval; for it is God's servant for your good.  (Romans 13:4)

I've never felt adept with trying to work out my Christianity in the realm of politics.  I have felt caught on the horns of the dilemma that Temple writes about.  I feel "damned if I do and damned if I don't."  I feel criticized when I venture political opinions that are based on scriptural principles because they are perceived as mere opinions and "merely spiritual."  On the other hand, when such opinions are from an opposing or different political position than the person I am speaking with, I am quickly dismissed as just being part of the opposition if I don't fully espouse their particular ideals.  Because of this, I keep a low profile and avoid most political conversations.

My solution is not viable.  I end up speaking about what I shouldn't and keeping silent when I should speak.  Everything has political implications when I understand that politics is about having social order and governing that social order.  The "duck and run" policy that I have leaves the decisions for governing in someone else's hands.  I must leave many things up to others to govern and determine.  Free reign, however, is a bad idea.

This is where Temple's issue of Original Sin kicks in.  People are predisposed to self-centeredness.  As a result, it is a disaster to leave people where they are and not move them to where they ought to be.  Goodness is where we ought to be.  Goodness is best understood in the purposes of God.  As a Christian, I need to understand that people will not serve nor seek God "naturally," but will need law and government to lead them to him.  Freedom, in our current culture, needs to move away from tied to mere desire be anchored in what is good.

Without this idea and movement toward what is good, desires tear communities and nations apart as well as my own life.  In Original Sin, impulsive desire rules.  Where such desire rules, no social order can long stand.  Everyone for himself is the shortcut to anarchy, where people act more like animals than human beings.

So what am I to do about this, especially in the realm of politics?  I need to apply the principles of Christianity to such places and expect that there will be criticism.  I need to live out of those principles and encourage others to do the same.  In the realm of our nation, I need to remember that "Sin is lawlessness."  (1 John 3:4)  Submission is often my first duty.

Within that duty, however, lies this truth:  Merely obeying the law is not righteousness.  The heart of relinquishing self-centeredness and doing good always lies in God's purposes and ends, not my own.  Law easily becomes a justification for self-centeredness when it is not tied to the goodness of God's mercy and his purposes.

When I receive God's mercy, I begin to who that I can be humble enough to truly obey laws and not just use them for my own purposes.  When I accept God's purposes, I begin to find that laws can bring him honor, even when they inconvenience me.  They show that there is authority above my own and that all my ideas and desires are not good.  The schoolmaster of civic law can bring me closer to Christ through such humility.

How does this deepen my compassion?  I realize that all people are in need of saving from Original Sin.  We are not what we ought to be.  I see that even in rather unsavory realm of politics, there are opportunities to learn humility and goodness for each person.  I see that lawlessness does not aid compassion, but instead attacks and curtails it from flowing in society.  I suppose I could say that laws are the means by which compassion flows through society, when it functions as it should.

Lord, teach me to be a channel and messenger of your peace and order.  Wean me from lawlessness, whether I am practicing it or allowing it.  Let me live by your rule and encourage others to do so as well.  Amen.


I begin to see the bigger picture of sin in society and how my silence can make me an accomplice to the many crimes of greed and anger that rage in our country.  I plan on praying and speaking more about these issues.

The Spirit Brings Gifts and Suffering

Devotional Classics, John Bunyan, Excerpts from Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners

Some of the saints who had good judgment and holiness of life seemed to feel that God had counted me worthy to understand the blessed Word and that he had given me some measure of ability to express helpfully to others what I saw in it.

I could not rest unless I was exercising this gift of preaching, and I was pressed forward into it.  I began to see that the Holy Spirit never intended that people who had gifts and abilities should bury them in the earth, but rather, he commanded and stirred up such people to the exercise of their gift and sent out to work those who were able and ready.

And when I saw that [those who were quickened by my preaching] were beginning to live differently, and that their hearts were eagerly pressing after the knowledge of Christ and rejoicing that God sent me to them, then I began to conclude that God had blessed his work through me.  And so I rejoiced.

I preached what I felt, even under which my own poor soul groaned and trembled.  Indeed, I was as one sent to them from the dead.  I went myself in chains, preached to them in chains, and had in my own conscience that fire which I pleaded with them to beware of.

In my preaching I have actually been in real pain, travailing to bring forth children of God, and I have never been satisfied unless there has been some fruit.  If not, it made no difference who complimented me, but if it were fruitful I did not care who might condemn me.

Sometimes I would suffer from discouragement, fearing that I would not be of any help to anyone and that I would not even be able to speak sense to the people.  At such times I have had a strange faintness seize me.

Gifts are desireable, but great grace and small gifts are better than great gifts and no grace.  The Bible does not say that the Lord gives gifts and glory, but that he gives grace and glory.  Blessed is everyone to whom the Lord gives true grace, for that is the forerunner of glory.

The fruit of the Holy Spirit is love, joy, and peace.  I long after these as feelings mostly, but I have also learned to seek after them as qualities and parts of my own character as well.  All this is well and good.  It makes me glad that God has promised this Spirit to me for all time.

However, as much as Jesus experienced love, joy, and peace in the Holy Spirit in his life, he also experienced that this same Spirit led him to and through the cross.  "How much more, then, will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself unblemished to God, cleanse our consciences from acts that lead to death, so that we may serve the living God!"  (Hebrews 9:14)  Although Jesus' death is entirely unique and cannot be replaced by any other act in its necessity and effectiveness, I too am to expect the Spirit to lead me to death: " If you live according to the [flesh, your natural talents and abilities and accomplishments], you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live."  (Romans 8:13)

Only in this apparent dichotomy can I make sense of John Bunyan's exercise of his gift of preaching.  On the one hand he says, "Gifts are desirable," but on the other hand he writes, "In my preaching, I have actually been in real pain."  It seems a strange "gift" from someone that would bring pain.  I might rather call it medicine at best.

The misunderstanding about the work of the Holy Spirit has led me astray, I fear.  I have understood that spiritual gifts would be something that I want to do and things that I would find that I have a special talent for.  I think this points to one side of experience.  John Bunyan did desire to preach and have God work through him.  Actually, the fact that he went through pain indicates how much he desired to preach.

Gifts from the Holy Spirit are also described as manifestations, work, and exercise in 1 Corinthians 12.  Also, the primary motivation for using them is building other people up in their relationship with God.  Without this motivation, gifts are not useful at all (1 Corinthians 13:1-3).  So in many ways such "gift-giving" is bound to bring pain and suffering because not everyone will receive such gifts that I want to give or use them well.

For myself, I have assumed if something was unpleasant for me to do, it could not be a spiritual gift.  I don't think that I assumed it would always be easy, but I was surprised that Bunyan would actually experience pain when exercising his gift.  What hit me about this is that suffering may be normal when exercising a gift.

This would explain why grace is so important when using gifts of the Spirit.  Without grace, I would have no hope of dealing with the suffering involved.  If I only exercise my spiritual gifts when I am certain they will be received and when I am certain I will "feel good" about exercising them, then I will find I practice them rarely.  Actually, I have found that I avoid using them.

One of the greatest pains of using a gift from the Spirit is that it hurts my pride.  If I use such gifts with any frequency, I find that I what I put in do not match what the Spirit accomplishes.  Gifts certainly take exercise, meaning work and effort, but not usually in a direct sense.  What I mean is that the more the gift and the work are submitted to God and his Spirit, the more effective it becomes.

I may study and pour over the Bible in order to prepare to teach.  Such effort can drive me to despair if I believe that the power of the teaching depends upon how much I study.  I become frantic as I prepare because I take in all on my own shoulders, that is, I work in the flesh.

Instead, I need to find a way to submit my preparation and the teaching to God through his Spirit.  This involves a regular and constant death of that frantic, worried work in the flesh.  I have to let go of the results and allow room for God's grace to work in and through me.  The suffering I experience is normal because it is directed at my pride.

Lord, I need to learn the practice of humble study and humble teaching.  I long to direct my efforts appropriately, otherwise I get frantic and hurried.  Please teach me and create in me a new heart.  Amen.


I find John Bunyan must be right in saying that small gifts and great grace are preferable to great gifts and no grace.  For gifts to be from the Spirit, they must have grace or they cannot be from the Spirit of grace.  It is grace that makes such gifts spiritual or of the Spirit.  Otherwise, they are not workings of grace, but expressions of my own talents and abilities.  I believe I may suffer less as I learn to accept and anticipate grace and let go of my own pride when serving other people.

Experiencing the Holy Spirit in Life's Moments

Devotional Classics, Jean-Pierre de Caussade, Excerpts from The Sacrament of the Present Moment

God's order, his pleasure, his will, his action and grace; all these are one and the same.  The purpose on earth of this divine power is perfection.

God's order and his divine will, humbly obeyed by the faithful, accomplishes this divine purpose in them without their knowledge in the same way as medicine obediently swallowed cures invalids who neither know nor care how.  Just as it is fire and not the philosophy or science of that element and its effects that heats, so it is God's order and his will which sanctify and not curious speculations about its origin and purpose.

To quench thirst it is necessary to drink.  Reading books about it only makes it worse.  Thus, when you long for sanctity, speculation only drives it further from our grasp.  We must humbly accept all that God's order requires us to do and suffer.

All we need to know is how to recognize his will in the present moment.  Grace is the will of God and his order acting in the center of of our hearts when we read or are occupied in other ways; theories and studies, without regard for the refreshing virtue of God's order, are mere dead letters, emptying the heart by filling the mind. 

Without God's direction, all is void, emptiness, vanity, words, superficiality, death.

Every moment, and in respect of everything, they must say, like St. Paul, "Lord, what should I do?"

It is by being united to the will of God that we enjoy and possess him, and it is a delusion to seek this divine possession by any other means.  Being united to God is the only way, not in any specific manner or style, but in a thousand different ways, and one he chooses for us is the best.

I must not, like the quietists, reduce all religion to a denial of any specific action, despising all means, since what makes perfection is God's order, and the means he ordains is the best for the soul.  No, we must set no bounds or limits or shape to the will of God.  (pp.200-203)

After these things God tested Abraham.  He said to him, "Abraham!"  And he said, ""Here I am."  He said, "Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains that I shall show you."  (Genesis 22:1-2)

 One of my first experiences of walking in the Spirit of God came at work.  Up to that point, I had found myself resisting work by trying to do other things that I considered better.  Some of them were better because they were more entertaining, some of the them more religious.  I was not seeking to be faithful in my work.

I began praying for my supervisors and praying Ephesians 5 about treating those over me as I would treat the Lord.  I began to see that I was not working only for my supervisors and employer, but primarily for God.  I realized that when I worked to please God, I could easily please my supervisors as well.

The change is not easy,  At first, I was convinced that God wanted me to be miserable.  I was willing to be miserable, however, if it pleased him.  However, I began to find that I could have joy in my work because it was work for him.  Also, such attention to the details of my work have developed my skills, increased my endurance, brought joy to my coworkers (some) and supervisors, and made me care about my work and its outcome.  Joy in work seems to be fairly rare as is evident from the constant complaints and job hatred I run into all the time.

I am not all the way there.  I have many habits that come easily and automatically that I have to work out of.  One of my recent struggles has been with looking for ways to obey and submit rather than looking for ways to escape and dodge the rules and expectations of my employers.  I found that generally  it is harder to disobey and be ever concerned about being "caught" or having to justify my actions than it is to just obey.

I also found that if I submit to everything except the things that are against God, my true employer, then I have very little that I can rightfully complain about or object to.  There may be many things that are inconvenient or even silly, but they are not really bad, just not what I want.

This is where walking in the Spirit is so essential.  It cannot be a mere "mind trick."  Just thinking that God is my boss and having him really direct and guide me in work and life are completely different.  One is delusional, the other practical.  I write a lot about "my end" of the work, but without God's end of it - his grace- all of my work means nothing and should earn me nothing by scorn.

I think think is one of the things that Jean-Pierre is criticizing.  Talking about fire will never warm me.  Thinking  there is fire when there isn't is mental illness.  Warmth comes from experiencing fire.  For some reason, I do like to content myself talking about God rather than seeking and finding him.  Probably this has to do with the ever-present idea that God will spoil what I want and what I want is what is most important.

Further, Jean-Pierre attacks the idea that I must try to get out of things that I am dealing with to be happy or even to find God.  Instead, I need to try to get into the things that are happening in my life, because that is where the Spirit is at work.  Instead of trying to escape many of the moments I am faced with - whether boredom or pain or frustration or sadness - I need to find what the will of God is in that situation and do it.

Many times I escape dealing with my life by worrying about things that I have little to do with.  This is where the Serenity prayer comes in handy: "Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference."  The special relationship each person has with God is embedded in the life they lead.  Each life provides the perfect blocks and experiences to find God and live in his will, his kingdom, which is full of love, joy, and peace.  Each experience can bring such movements of grace if I realize that God has a purpose for each moment.

The Holy Spirit, then, is present in my life as I live it  So easily I am tempted to try to obtain guidance, power, or joy in the Spirit by changing my life rather than living it.  There are changes that need to be made, but this is not what I talking about.  I am talking about the things that Are set before usually on a daily basis: working at my joy and at home, loving my wife and kids, serving at church and in the community, dealing with frustrations and having celebrations, etc.  All of these things are the doorways in which the Spirit can enter and transform me.  I guess that I the reason I avoid living these mundane aspects of life is that I want change that will be faster, greater, or more noticeable to myself and others.  Jean-Pierre says this is not only a possible way to walk with the Spirit, but really it is the only way to walk in the Spirit.

 Lord, the life you have given to me is a blessing.  Certainly many things have gone "well" for me, but even more my life, like everyone else's, is a place in which I can walk with you in the Spirit and receive specific training and growth toward the destiny you have for me.  May I be found useful.  I depend on you each moment to show me how to live this life.  Amen.


I find myself seeking God's will in each situation.  I find myself asking, "What should I do, Lord?"  I find that I have resistance to asking and seeking because I hope somehow to live my life as I please.  This is disaster.  I am not made to live my live by myself for myself any more than I am made to live my whole life in a cave.  I have been made with a dependency on the Lord, to be filled with his Spirit as a jar is filled with treasure or wine.  I need to be filled each moment as God guides me in each moment until I do what he wants without thinking about it.

Spiritual Movements, Both Holy and Unholy

Devotional Classics, Ignatius of Loyola, Excerpts from The Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius

The following are some rules for perceiving and understanding the different movements that are produced in the soul - the good that should be accepted; the bad that should be rejected.

I call it consolation when the soul is aroused by an interior movement which causes it to be inflamed with love of its Creator and Lord and consequently can love no created thing in this world for its own sake.

I call desolation all that is contrary to [consolation], as darkness of the soul, turmoil of the mind, inclination to low and earthly things, restlessness resulting from many disturbances and temptations which leads to loss of faith, loss of hope, loss of love.

For just as consolation is contrary to desolation, so the thoughts that spring from consolation are the opposite of those that spring from desolation.

In time of desolation one should never make a change. . . .  Although in desolation we should not change our earlier resolutions, it will be very advantageous to intensify our activity against desolation.

A person who is in consolation ought to think of how he will conduct himself during a future desolation and thus build up a new strength for that time.  A person who is in consolation would also take care to humble and abase himself as much as possible.

The enemy will lose courage and take flight as soon as a person who is following the spiritual life stands courageously against his temptations and does exactly the opposite of what the enemy suggests.  On the contrary, if a person begins to take flight and loses courage in the midst of  fighting temptation, no wild beast on earth is more fierce than the enemy as he pursues his evil intention with ever increasing malice.

The enemy behaves like a false lover who wishes to remain hidden and does not want to be revealed. . . .  In like manner, when the enemy tempts a just soul with his wiles and deceits, he wishes and desires that they be received in secret.

Also, it is characteristic of the evil one to transform himself into an angel of light, to work with the soul in the beginning, but in the end work for himself. . . .  It is well for a person show has been tempted to examine the course of the good thoughts that were suggested to him.

In those who are making spiritual progress, the action of the good angel is gentle, light, and sweet, as a drop of water entering a sponge.  The action of the evil spirit is sharp, noisy, and disturbing, like a drop of water falling upon a rock.  In those souls that are going from bad to worse, the action of these two spirits is the reverse. . . .  When the disposition of the soul and that of the spirits are similar, they enter silently as one coming into his own house through an open door.  (pp. 193-197)

Like a roaring lion your adversary the devil prowls around, looking for someone to devour.  Resist him, steadfast in your faith.  (1 Peter 5:4)

One of the most important aspects to walking with the Spirit is discernment.  The spiritual realm is surprisingly full and active.  The seemingly "empty space" that surrounds me is full of such activity.  I become aware of it as I start swimming against the stream of the world.

Ignatius writes so clearly, I feel at home with him immediately.  He has very concrete and distinct descriptions of spiritual activity and the warfare I face.  What is striking is that all the thoughts and feelings associated with them that I sense do not originate within myself.  This is a great comfort and gives room for discernment.

It may be that the miracle of coherence that exists between people as they speak and communicate may be based on this similarity of the thoughts and feelings they encounter from outside themselves.  The connection between two people as they talk about "water" or a "chair" exists not only in the similarity of the objects, but in the similarity of their comprehension of the objects.  Such similarity has something to do with how they are made, but perhaps also has to do with a continual  common sea of thoughts and feelings that they float in in the spiritual realm.  Just a thought.

I love the simplicity that Ignatius uses to define these movements within my spirit.  I find his ideas helpful in the realm of everyday spiritual warfare.  Rather than being stories from The Exorcist, he speaks of daily battles in which the war is won or lost.

The three fronts he mentions in these passages are my weakness, my spiritual progress, my hidden thoughts, and good things that distract me from God.  In these fronts he is quite plain in dealing with evil spirits.  Resist them.  In weakness, stand and oppose.  With spiritual progress, intensify and do not waver.  With shameful hidden thoughts, reveal them as temptations.  With good things that take me away from God, resist and review them so that I am not fooled again.

One other thing I have become aware of is how certain people seem to show up on these fronts to encourage or discourage me.  They almost seem to know what I am going through and make it harder or easier.  What is really strange is that some people I would think would be on the good side are not and some of the most unlikely people come to encourage me out of the blue that I would not even know were my allies.  Such is the nature of spiritual warfare.

I struggle with opposing and resisting because of these people who come.  I do not want to oppose certain people, but I must.  I cry out to God, Why them?  This may be the thickest fighting I have to go through.  Rejection from people I may know and love who oppose God's work in and around me hurts terribly.  But really, even strangers who oppose such things and pick on my weaknesses still hurt.  I need to remember resisting is what is best for myself and for them.

 Father, let your Spirit be a guide and a shield to me as I face temptation and trial.  Let me take the times of peace as times in which I can prepare for battle even as I enjoy the consolations.  Forgive me when I stay too long and run from difficulties instead of resisting them.  Amen.


Spiritual warfare is so spiritual.  It may keep under the radar because it deals with things that are unseen and because opportunities for such resistance are everywhere.  Really all I need to do is start swimming against the current to feel the resistance.  As long as I float down the stream, I won't notice the strength of the current.  Spiritual warfare takes place when I resist, not when I'm being conformed to the lies and ideals of this present age.  The more I resist, the more I know of warfare.

The Spirit and Walking in Power

Devotional Classics, George Fox, Excerpts from The Letters of George Fox

He is the living God that gives you breath, life, and strength and gives you beasts and cattle whereby you may be fed and clothed.  He is the living God, and he is to be worshiped.  This is the King of kings and the Lord of lords, in whose hand is the breath of all mankind.

Walk in the power of the Truth that the name of the Lord God may be glorified among you, his renown may be seen in you and among you, and all the world may be astonished, and the Lord admired in the ordering of his people who are guided by his wisdom.

Now Friends, who have denied the world's songs and singing, sing you in the Spirit and with grace, making melody in your hearts to the Lord.  You that have denied the world's formal praying, pray always in the Spirit.  You that have denied the world's giving thanks and their saying grace and living out of it, do you in everything give thanks to the Lord through Jesus Christ.  And you that have denied the world's praising God with their lips, while their hearts are far off, do you always praise the Lord night and day.

Wherever you are, in prison, or out of prison, where two of three are gathered together in his name, there is a Church, and Christ the living Head in the midst of them.

Whatever your calling [vocation], live in the power of Truth and wisdom of God to answer that just principle of God in all people upon the earth.  So, let your lives preach, let your light shine, that your works may be seen, that your Father may be glorified.  (George Fox, pp.186-188)

 Yet on the day of your fasting, you do as you please and exploit all your workers.  Your fasting ends in quarreling and strife, and in striking each other with wicked fists. You cannot fast as you do today and expect your voice to be heard on high. (Isaiah 58:3-4)

 I am amazed at how quickly I forget things.  I feel like a child needing constant reminders to stay "on task."  Yet the reminders here are not the nagging I am used to receiving and giving.  They are reminders of inspiration and hope, encouragement and passion.  Such reminders come from the Spirit, who knows my weakness yet loves me well.

"He is the living God."  Can any phrase seem simpler?  Yet I still forget.  He not only created everything in the universe, he sustains it.  Without the Spirit, there is no life to what I do, be it ever so noble.  The sustaining hand of God works by the Spirit in my spirit, giving life and breath to what I may do with him.

I find it hard to "walk in the power" of the Lord.  I prefer to rely on what power I have and accept what results I get.  I fear walking in the power because I do not control it so much as it has a hold on me.  I fear the power may ask of me.  This power is power that works for God's glory, not mine.  I suppose I am afraid to give up my glory and "look bad" for God's sake.

What if I pray for someone's healing and it doesn't happen?  What if I express my worship in passion and praise?  What if I share the God-given gifts and miracles with other people to show God's great and good power?  They may not like it.  They may not like me.  But walking in the power is not for me do direct and decide about, it is taking the hand of the Spirit of power and going with him, and at times being carried away by him.

I have disdained religion that is like a "dull habit" rather than a "fever," but do I merely point out such lifelessness without partaking in life myself?  It is easy to criticize, but hard to change.  Only by the Spirit does such change occur.  Only he can put truth, passion, power, and joy into the things that I do for the Lord and for others.  I can assist and accept his work and must do so, but I cannot do it alone.

Criticism is what comes out of my effort to change relying solely on my flesh, my natural abilities.  I may refuse to take part in "dead rituals" or "hypocritical gatherings" and point out the "traditionalism" that keeps people from really finding God.  But criticism is like spectators in sports: they don't really play the game.  Humility and transformation come from my cooperation and surrender to the Spirit and his ways.  Humility because of my bumbling and neediness through it all.  Transformation because the Spirit works wonders according to God's mercy.

He lives!  And I am to walk in that reality of living power, not just point out where it lacks.  And so it comes to my vocation and my religion.  The power can be present as I work and as I am present at services and meetings.  Without the living power of God in me and beside me, I cannot "expect [my] voice to be heard on high."  Rather such efforts will result in prayers that do not make it "past the ceiling" and works that will be just part of the "grind."

So I must pray and then pray some more.  Nothing else will avail but asking God to help and learning how to wait on his aid.  The Spirit of God is with me.  I just need to open my hands to receive his gifts and most importantly, his hand.

Lord God of heaven, you are everywhere.  I cannot escape you except by forgetting you.  You have poured out your Spirit on all people.  The blessing, the power, the goodness, the love, the joy that you have are available to us.  Give me the grace to accept your gift and not be afraid for myself.  Let me walk in your living power and not stand on the sidelines in criticism.  Amen.


One of the most important part of walking in the power of the living Spirit of God is the joy of salvation.  As I walk, I see where I've been, what I would be without God's mercy and grace, and how he continues to overcome sin in my life.  This perseverance given through the Spirit brings good character to my life and I find hope in his salvation (Romans 5).  But even with these favors he has given, I will always find the joy of salvation to be this: "I once was lost, but now I'm found, was blind, but now I see."  I will always be first and foremost a sinner saved by grace.

The Everyday-ness of the Spirit

Devotional Classics, Catherine of Genoa, Excerpts from Life and Teachings

The creature is incapable of knowing anything except what God gives to it from day to day.  If it knew what God intends for it, it would never be at peace.

We end up doing our own will under many covers - of charity, of necessity, or of justice.  But God's love wills to stand naked and without any cover since it has nothing to hide.  I have seen this love.  Indeed, every day I feel myself more occupied with him, and I feel a greater fire within.

I find my mind more restricted upon God every day.  It is like a man who at first is free to roam the city, and then is confined to a house, and then to a room, then to a smaller room, and finally bound and blind-folded until there is no way of escape.  With no comfort except in God who was doing this all along through love and great mercy, I came to a place of great contentment.

If we are to see properly, we must pluck out of our eyes our own presumption.  If we gaze too long at the sun, we go blind; in this manner, I think, does pride blind many of us who want to know too much.

He knows that we are the kind who will not leave our one little toy unless we are offered four!
As I think about you, my spiritual children, I see that God's pure love is attentive to all of you needs.  It is because of this tender love that I need not ask anything of God for you.  All I need to do is lift you up before his face. (Catherine of Genoa, pp. 180-183)

“Abraham replied, ‘They have Moses and the Prophets; let them listen to them.’
“ ‘No, father Abraham,’ he said, ‘but if someone from the dead goes to them, they will repent.’
"He said to him, ‘If they do not listen to Moses and the Prophets, they will not be convinced even if someone rises from the dead.’ ” (Luke 16:29-31)

The "everyday-ness" of the Holy Spirit makes him go unnoticed.  This is an irony, really, since the Spirit is holy, that is, set apart, and not mundane.  He is unique and not meant to be neglected any more than any other holy thing, and yet he moves around almost secretly in my existence.

I think one reason for this everyday-ness is that the Spirit works with me little by little.  He gives me what I need for the day, mostly, and no more.  Revelations have to do with work and raising my kids and loving my wife more than what the nations of the earth are about.  Like a little child I am often distracted by the big things, the bright colors, and the loud noises produced by the world, leaving the small voice of the Spirit behind.

Another reason I miss the voice of the Spirit is that he moves me in the direction of greater concentration and appreciation of God that blocks out much of the world's persistent invitations to taste, eat, drink, and feel.  This is unpleasant at first.  It is not that Spirit wants to keep me away from experiencing such pleasures because God doesn't like them.  He made them!  No, the Spirit "restricts," as Catherine puts it, in order to bring my full attention upon the Father, the giver of all good things.  People consider a child spoiled if he loves gifts more than the giver of the gifts.  So the Spirit seeks to wean me from inordinate pleasure-seeking (what is called greed or lust.)

Although I may seek my pleasure under the guise "of charity, of necessity, or of justice," the Spirit takes away these "covers" and reveals that the only true motivation that can stand on its own is the love of God.  It is self-authenticating and can stand "naked" without any other cover or justification.  The Spirit reveals this seemingly plain statement of love toward God is the basis for all true power, for all things that will last, and for all pleasure.

The Spirit does not take away without giving.  Much has been made of this characteristic abundance of the Holy Spirit.  In one sense, such giving and generosity needs to be emphasized.  We are encouraged to ask God for our wants and needs, and above all, he gives us his Spirit as his greatest gift (Luke 11:13).  We are made to seek pleasure in that goodness has pleasures associated with it.  It is good and pleasurable to have love, joy, and peace in my life.  In this way, the restriction of the Spirit enables me to receive the true gifts from the Spirit.  Because I find that "God alone is good" and enjoy the gifts of this life as indications and revelations of his goodness, the intensity of the pleasure is determined by the love and enjoyment I have in God himself.  The gifts themselves can be distracting from this single-mindedness of enjoying God and him alone, and the Spirit will never detract from my love and focus on the Father and the Son.

Also, the everyday-ness of the Spirit slips my attention because of his constant provision for all my needs.  So many things are provided that I fail to take note of without special attention.  The Spirit enables and encourages such special attention either by emphasizing such gifts in their intensity, place, or timing in my life.  The words, "Thank you" can be as common as air around me, but when spoken is a certain way or at a certain time, they can be powerfully life-giving and significant.  I believe this is a lot of what the Spirit can do, if I am attentive to his voice and his work.

One of the masterpieces of the Holy Spirit is the Bible.  Because of its everyday-ness in much of its content and the constant insistence of the world that it is just like any other book, this great work goes unnoticed by many people.  The lack of notice or the wrong kind of attention show just how easy it is to ignore or misunderstand the Holy Spirit.  He authored the Bible through the hearts and lives of people seeking God and his ways.  For those who cannot see this, more dramatic works of the Spirit, even up to resurrection, will be misunderstood or even just missed.

So I find that I miss the Spirit because he works often little by little instead of through obvious means.  I miss him because he directs my heart and mind toward God with increasing "restriction" so that I might find true pleasure in him.  I miss him because of his constant provision.  The Bible shows one great example of the how the Spirit can seem so ordinary and everyday like words just written on a page taken in little by little directing my heart to love God and yet, also change myself and those around me with the great knowledge and power stored in that book.

Lord, allow me to walk in the Spirit.  I am impressed with how I am told to walk with him.  I may be carried and transported at times, but those are not what you command.  You say simply to walk.  In the Spirit I pray, "Give us this day our daily bread."  I rejoice in your care in staying with me in ordinary days, Holy Spirit.  May your power be evident in such times to all who seek the Father.  Amen.


The Spirit says to me, "He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit.  While every branch that does bear fruit, he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful."  (John 17:2)  There is no loss, no cut, no wound, no disappointment that the Spirit will not take and bring back more goodness, grace, and gift than what was taken away.  This is the gospel.  This is the power of the Spirit.


He giveth more grace as our burdens grow greater,
He sendeth more strength as our labors increase;
To added afflictions He addeth His mercy,
To multiplied trials He multiplies peace.

When we have exhausted our store of endurance,

When our strength has failed ere the day is half done,

When we reach the end of our hoarded resources

Our Father’s full giving is only begun.

Fear not that thy need shall exceed His provision,

Our God ever yearns His resources to share;

Lean hard on the arm everlasting, availing;

The Father both thee and thy load will upbear.

His love has no limits, His grace has no measure,

His power no boundary known unto men;

For out of His infinite riches in Jesus

He giveth, and giveth, and giveth again. (Annie J. Flint)

Walking with the Spirit in This Present Age

A Testament of Devotion, Thomas R. Kelly, The Eternal Now and Social Concern

What is the Eternal Now? We live our lives at two levels simultaneously, the level of time and the level of the Timeless. They form one sequence, with a fluctuating border between them. Sometimes the glorious Eternal is in the ascendancy, but still we are aware of our daily temporal routine. Sometimes the clouds settle low and we are chiefly in the world of time, yet we are haunted by a smaller sense of Presence, in the margin of consciousness.

Instead of anxiety lest the future never yield all we have hoped, lest we fail to contribute our full stint before the shadows of the evening fall upon our lives, we only breathe a quiet prayer to the Now and say, "Stay, thou art so sweet." Instead of anxiety lest our past, our past defects, our long-standing deficiencies blight our well-intentioned future efforts, all our past sense of weakness falls away and we stand erect, in this holy Now, joyous, serene, assured, unafraid.

I am persuaded that religious people do not with sufficient seriousness count on God as an active factor in the affairs of the world. "Behold, I stand at the door hand knock," but too many well-intentioned people are so preoccupied with the clatter of effort to do something for God that they don't hear Him asking that He might do something through them.

Heaven's eternal Now within us makes us speak blasphemous things, for we seem to assume the prerogatives of God.

The fellowship is not founded upon a common subjective experience, like the fellowship of hay-fever sufferers! It is founded upon a common Object, who is known by them all to be the very Life within them. This is Reality which removes Quakerism from pure individualism and from pure subjectivism, as it is so commonly and so mistakenly interpreted.

Speaking of his openings Fox said he found that "they answered one another and answered the scriptures." There is a unity and coherence and rational continuity in the out-cropping guidances of Spirit-led men.

But in the sense of Presence some of the past nows of our time-now change their character entirely. Our old failures are so apt to paralyze us. The Eternal Now many counsel: "Undertake this." Our time-now says: "See what a weakling you proved yourself to be in an earlier case. Better not try it now." But the assurance of the Eternal Now is enough, as it should have been for Moses: "Surely I shall be with thee." Submit yourself to the Eternal Now and in peace serene, in the boldness of perfect faith, you can advance into miraculous living. Or, in the opposite direction, our time-now may say: "Do this. You are well prepared for it. Your education and training fit you, perhaps to teach, to preach, to counsel, to guide an enterprise. And if you don't , nobody will." But the Eternal Now in us may say: "Stay. Wait. Don't rely upon yourself. Don't think you can reason yourself into your obligation. Know you not I can raise up of these stones men better able to do this?"

The fluctuation between the Timeless and timed, the Eternal Now and the ribbon of temporal time seems to confuse many people. Really, I believe that when we are oriented toward the world as Kelly has said earlier, both hating it and loving it, when we see that nothing matters and everything matters, we can navigate the fluctuation between the Eternal Now and our normal ribbon of time.

Practically speaking, I have only surfed that wave on occasion when God was right with me and the winds were favorable. I think I learn much from Ignatius who instructed us to just do the opposite of what the devil wants and thus you will find God. Loving the world in the wrong way leads to lust and pride. Hating the world in the wrong way leads to pride and anger. Humility may be the only way to despise what I should despise and have compassion for the world.

Truly, such navigation keeps me in the guiding light of God. Without the humility to seek justice and love mercy, that is, to justly avoid and restrain what is evil and embrace and show kindness to what is needy, I will not hear God when he speaks or follow his light where it leads.

Some important anchors to hold me in the Eternal Now: God stands before me now and always, I will know wisdom and companionship by its similarity to the Life inside me, sometimes I will think myself presumptuous as I follow, and such occasions will answer each other and answer the scriptures.

Lord, may your Spirit be always present, always now to me.  Help me to walk with humility and kindness in this world, guided by your Spirit alone.  Without your Spirit, I am lost.  Amen.

The Spirit and Community

A Testament of Devotion, Thomas R. Kelly, The Blessed Community

In wonder and awe we find ourselves already interknit within unofficial groups of kindred souls.  A "chance" conversation comes, and in a few moments we know that we have been found by another member of the Blessed Community. Sometimes we are thus suddenly knit together in the bonds of love far faster than those of many years' acquaintance.

Where the Fellowship is lacking the Church invisible is lacking and the Kingdom of God has not yet come. For these bonds of divine love and "carrying" are the stuff of Kingdom of God. He who is in the Fellowship is in the Kingdom.

For me this experience of community is both exciting and worrisome. Exciting because the Community stands as a potential anywhere and at any time. Worrisome because I have so little control over finding such community.

At least, the control is not one that I want to exercise. I need to become what I hope to find.

Such community is the heart of the invisible Church and the Kingdom of God according to Kelly. I can see this since God's desire is that I would not only find him and be with him, but find his family and be with them as well.

God has set it up so that only when I seek him with all my heart will I find this hidden community. One cannot seek it directly, but only in joining with others who are seeking to follow Jesus.

As I live in this world with all its problems and short-comings let me seek the family you have here by seeking you, Father.  The bonds of love are tied by your Holy Spirit.  Amen.

The Spirit and Obedience

A Testament of Devotion, Thomas R. Kelly, Holy Obedience

What is the nature of holy obedience? "There are plenty to follow our Lord half-way, but not the other half. They will give up possessions, friends, and honors, but it touches them too closely to disown themselves." (Meister Eckhart) It is just this astonishing life which is willing to follow Him the other half, sincerely to disown itself.

There is a degree of holy and complete obedience and of joyful self-renunciation and of sensistive listening that is breath-taking. Differences of degree passes over into utter difference of kind, when one tries to follow Him the second half.

In some, says William James, religion exists as a dull habit, in others as an acute fever. Religion as a dull habit is not that for which Christ lived and died.

Difference of degree and kind in obedience reveal themselves as readily as the difference between dull habit and acute fever. When I follow only "the first half," then difference of degree becomes paramount. I see others, weigh their actions against my own, and then judge them accordingly. Who has given more? Who has kept too much?

When I follow the "second half" of the way of Jesus, there is only one thing to give: myself. Degree no longer matters, only total surrender. When I give the second half, the first half follows accordingly. Where I put my heart, my treasures are already laid. It is remarkable that I can give so much up and not give myself.

How do I enter holy obedience? Let us dare to venture together into the inner sanctuary of the soul, where God meets man in awful immediacy. There is an indelicacy in too-ready speech. Paul felt it unlawful to speak of the things of the third heaven. But there is also a false reticence, as if these things were one's own possession, about which we should modestly keep quiet, whereas they are wholly God's amazing work and we are nothing, mere passive receivers.

Our interest just now is in the life of complete obedience to God, not in amazing revelations of His glory graciously granted only to some. Yet the amazing experiences of the mystics leave a permanent residue, a God-subdued, a God-possessed will. States of consciousness are fluctuating. The vision fades. But holy and listening and alert obedience remains, as the core and kernel of a God-intoxicated life, as the abiding pattern of sober, work-a-day living.

The first step to the obedience of the second half is the flaming vision of the wonder of such a life.

Once having the vision, the second step to holy obedience is this: Begin where you are. Obey now. . . .Every moment behind the scenes be in prayer, offering yourselves in continuous obedience. I find this internal continuous prayer life absolutely essential.

The third step. . . if you slip and stumble and forget God for an hour, . . . begin again, just where you are.

A fourth consideration in holy obedience is this: Don't grit your teeth and clench your fists and say, "I will! I will!" Relax. Take hands off. Submit yourself to God.

Once again I see vision. I must see a life I want to live. I must desire something beyond myself. It is hope.

Vision is not necessarily an ecstatic experience, but it must be compelling. If it is real, it leads to real life. Obedience is practiced in the body, in my society, not merely in my mind. If the vision is real, then the practice will be more a matter of giving in than of trying. I need to step aside more than step up to the plate.

What are the fruits of holy obedience? They are the passion for personal holiness and the sense of utter humility.

Humility rests upon the disclosure of the consummate wonder of God, upon finding that only God counts, that all our own self-originated intentions are works of straw.

Humility rests on holy blindness, like the blindedness of of him who looks steadily into the sun.

Growth in humility is a measure of our growth in the habit of the God-directed mind.

Self-renunciation means God-possession, the being possessed by God. Out of utter humility and self-forgetfulness comes the thunder of the prophets, "Thus saith the Lord."

Ironic that humility from obedience causes blindness to one's good deeds while self-righteousness from pride cause blindness to one's evil deeds.

Humility comes from a continued dependence on God, like a child dependent on a parent.

I have had just a little sense of this humility and self-forgetfulness that brings discernment without condemnation and a real sense of God's work in a place or a life. Because it is hard to remain dependent on God and hard to forget myself, such occurrences are still fairly sporadic. But they stir my heart greatly.

Ponder this paradox in religious experience: "Nothing matters; everything matters. . . ." It is a key of entrance into suffering. He who knows only one half of the paradox can never enter that door of mystery and survive.

The heart is stretched through suffering, and enlarged. But O the agony of this enlargening of the heart, that one may be prepared to enter into the anguish of others!

The Cross as dogma is painless speculation; the Cross as lived is anguish and glory. Yet God, out of the pattern of His own heart, has planted the Cross along the road of holy obedience. And He enacts in the hearts of those He loves the miracle of willingness to welcome suffering and to know it for what it is - the final seal of His gracious love.

Little "crosses" may lay the road for larger ones. What is inconvenient may help me face what is difficult and then prepare me for what is painful and finally help me to stand before what seems unendurable. The lie that often finds me is that I will really deal differently with real pain that I do with inconveniences. "When it really matters, I will stand." This does not stand in the Bible or in life examples.

The last fruit of holy obedience is the simplicity of the trusting child. . . . The mark of this simplified life is radiant joy.

There is a deeper, an internal simplification of the whole of one's personality, stilled, tranquil, in childlike trust listening ever to Eternity's whisper, walking with a smile into the dark.

Douglas Steere wisely says that true religion often appears to be the enemy of the moralist. For religion cuts across the fine distinctions between several virtues and gathers all virtues into the one supreme quality of love.

This simplicity sounds like an integrated soul, working harmoniously between the various parts of a person. This kind of soul attracts and repels people. The peace, joy, and love attract them, but the utter trust required frightens them. I can see why the moralist would be the enemy of such a simplicity, such an integrated soul: they do not trust God the bring rightness within; they think it must be jammed in from without.

These fruits show that the abundance of life and the obedience to God are inseparable, not because of a cause/effect relationship, but because they are, actually, the same thing. Obedience is abundance. I see this most plainly in simplicity which has the rigor of obedience, but the restfulness of abundance simultaneously.

Lord, may my vision of a life in obedience to you yield humility in my heart.  Amen.

The Spirit as the Light Within

Testament of Devotion, Thomas R. Kelly, The Light Within

What is the Light Within? The Eternal Inward Light does not die when ecstasy dies, nor exist intermittently, with the flickering of our psychic states. Continuously renewed immediacy, not receding memory of the Divine Touch, lies at the base of religious living.

I find I use previous experiences as a starting point into his presence, but I see that it can be no more than the calling for "Encore!" and therefore a mere memory. This is why the continued study of scripture draws me close to God and ushers me into his presence for a time.

However, I can also become obsessed with the ecstasy of discovery in my studies and meditations. Although, God lies before me as an undiscovered country, I dare not equate his presence to the joy of discovery either.

Here we have a basso ostinato. His presence is an underlying movement (obstinate or stubborn) that remains within my life. Sometimes I can focus on him directly, hearing his majestic consistency upholding the quips and tweets of my life. Other times, I notice him more through the harmony he produces with other part of my life. The harmony is the sense of working with him. My focus is my work, rest, or play, but upholding it all is the glorious bass of God's pleasure in me, love for me, and guidance in the midst of my life.

It's like my kids who enjoy many things by doing them with me, but also enjoy doing many things because of me. I supply resources, safety, approval, guidance, etc. I find intense pleasure in playing and working with my kids, but also in seeing them able to play because of my presence.

With God's presence at the base of all religious living, Kelly concludes:

He is the center and the source of action, not the end-point of thought. He is the locus of commitment, not a problem for debate. Practice comes first in religion, not theory or dogma. And Christian practice is not exhausted in outward deeds. These are the fruits, not the roots.

Since God's presence is the base, my reciprocal presence is the appropriate answer. Whatever reflection or study I may do on the presence of God is chaff if it does not invite me to be with God. Great thoughts about God or great discussions about God lead inevitably to death and dryness if they do not raise me up to God himself.

Similarly, outward deeds will not take me to God. When practiced rightly, they are what comes from being with him. At a distance, smoke and dust look similar, but upon closer inspection, smoke comes from fire while dust comes from wind and hurry. Outward deeds look similar at a distance, but some come from the fire of God's presence consuming a life, while others come merely from the empty breezes and hurried feet of people trying to say or do something important. When I begin any activity, I need to ask, "Where's the fire?"

How do I stay with the Light Within? There is a way of ordering our mental life on more than one level at once.

The awareness of God's presence does not erase all other forms of thought, but works above them. Perhaps in Hebrew thought, this is life "in the shadow of your wings." God's presence is meant to overshadow all that I do. I act and think with the assumption that the Lord is over me and under me, beside me and within me. When this knowledge becomes intimate, all thought and all life changes.

The contrast to this awareness is the secular mind, which Kelly describes well.

The secular world of today. . . scorns, or smiles in tolerant amusement, at the cultivation of the second level - a luxury enterprise, a vestige of superstition, an occupation for special temperaments. . . . The secular mind is an abbreviated, fragmentary mind, building only upon a part of man's nature and neglecting a part - the most glorious part - of man's nature, powers, and resources.

The scorn thinly veils anger toward God's presence. It is contempt. It is defensive. The secular mind cannot, indeed, it must not accept this presence or it will lead to its self-destruction and the admission that the most important thing in life and the most important knowledge for living life has been left out. Dallas Willard says that believing the world is flat is paltry compared to this blunder. It is simply absurd.

The contempt is a defensive mechanism. The blockade results in a mind that is immature and incomplete. The mind not set on the Spirit is like a flickering light. Sometimes it works, sometimes not. It cannot venture far. It always makes the work slow and sloppy. Nothing can be sustained for long with this condition. The secular mind must often say, "Good enough" to its many projects.

The secular mind is a room I enter in my own mind. This is where I forget and lapse. I love the confession Kelly gives for those times: This is what I am except Thou aid me. I do not want to stay there, but neither do I want to pretend that I never go there.

The basic growth into the awareness of God's presence comes in this way:

The processes of inward prayer do not grow more complex, but more simple. In the early weeks, we begin with simple, whispered words. . . . For the conscious cooperation of the surface level is needed at first, before prayer sinks into the second level as habitual divine orientation.

If you find, after a time, that these attitudes [of worship, humility, surrender, etc.] become diffused and vague, no longer firm-textured, then return to verbalizations and thus restore solidity.

Longer discipline in this inward prayer will establish more enduring upreachings of praise and submission and relaxed listening in the depths, unworded but habitual orientation of all one's self about Him who is the Focus.

[In "infused prayer"] the autonomy of the inner life becomes complete and we are joyfully prayed through, by a Seeking Life that flows through us into the world of men.

Basically Worded Prayer shrinks in size as I enter God's presence more, until words are not necessary. I like his warning of how such unworded prayer can become "mushy" and needs solid thought to sustain it. Otherwise I believe it can lead to sentimentalism or nostalgia.

Words fade as God's presence becomes more infused within me. At first it is an "orientation" in which a orbit God's presence. As I go I then become united with God, not losing myself, but finding myself in him. He then works not just with me, but through me, and I am no longer fragmentary and abbreviated, but completed by his presence. Without his abiding presence, my life is incomplete, not as it should be. I was made a vessel, to hold and exude his presence.

How does the Light Within guide me? Guidance of life. . . begins first of all in a mass revision of our total reaction to the world. . . . This total instruction proceeds in two opposing directions at once. We are torn loose from earthly attachments and ambitions - contemptus mudi. And we are quickened to a divine but painful concern for the world - armor mundi.

This is the being "in the world, but not of it" paradox. I am used to hearing this when talking about evangelism, not guidance. When I am confused, then, I have failed on one side of the paradox, either falling into an inordinate love of the world and its pleasures, or falling into a disdain for the world and its people. Guidance comes first from this tension of keeping my mind and heart on heavenly things, but also loving the world as God does.

The result: But instructed in one point of view of the paradox, we bestride the mountains or the valleys of earthly importance with a holy indifference, contempt, and detachment. Placed in coveted surroundings, recipients of honors, we count them as refuse, as nothing, utterly nothing. Placed in the shadows, we are happy to pick up a straw for the love of God. No task is so small as to distress us, no honor so great as to turn our heads.

Guidance is short-circuited by the wrong attitude toward the world. I live in this world. God lives with me and guides me in and through this world. If I do not have the right attitude toward this world, then guidance will be heard, but misunderstood. God's word will come, but when he guides me, I will say, "God forbid that such a thing should happen!" because I will have some attachment or some anger that prevents me from hearing and doing rightly.

Lord, sustain me with your presence. Let my fleshly mind be ignored and my fleshly life abhorred. Let this world be a side-attraction I can leave behind and also the main event of my life when I seek to love and sympathize with those lost in madness around me. I want to hear you rightly, so that your words will not be a source of confusion, but piece that brings the puzzle together. Amen.

Virtue and Temptation Again

Devotional Classics, Teresa of Avila, Excerpts from Interior Castle

It is at this stage that the devils will attack the soul with the earthly pleasures of this world, like snakes who bite with deadly poison.  They trick the soul into thinking that such pleasures will last an eternity; they remind the soul of the high esteem in which it is held in the world; they place before it the many friends and relatives who will disagree with the manner of life you have now begun. . . .

 When you feel the beginnings of temptation, do not fight back with strenuous efforts, but rather, gently begin a time of prayer and recollection.  At first it will be difficult, but after a while you will be able to do ti easily, and for long periods of time.

Do not think that you must stop doing your work in order to pray.  The Lord will turn all of our work time into profit as long as we continue in a spirit of prayer.  There is no remedy for the temptations that we face except to start at the beginning, and the beginning is prayer.  The only way to lose is to turn back. (pp.197, 199)

Looking at this picture of Teresa of Avila, I am reminded of her monastic life.  She was a nun from age 19.  I have had mixed feelings about this.  On the one hand, the life in a convent was so unlike my own, and so unlike that of Jesus and his disciples.  Most people have jobs and work and raise families.  On the other hand, the dedication and concentration that she and others like her devoted to prayer makes me admire her, as I would a scientist doing research for a cure to a dreaded disease.  In the end both have made my life seem mundane and distant from the one she talks about because of its distance from monastic life and because of my lack of concentration on the matters that Teresa dedicated her life to.

If I seek to remove some of the "monkish wrappings" from her words and thoughts, I find that she is not speaking about the life of a recluse or hermit in particular, but about life in general.  The monastic influence places some barriers in front of my understanding and appreciating what she has to say, but I also believe that my own lack of desire to seek God with all that I am plays no small part in my hesitation to accept her words and learn from them.  This is the nature of "early stages" of prayer, as she puts it.  The lack of desire to leave temptation ans sin behind has kept me from seeking God numerous times.

This is not something that I became aware of until I saw it in hindsight.  When I was in the middle of these temptations, I did not recognize many of them to be temptations at all, but just "how I am."  Because I didn't recognize temptation, I did not recognize how much I was sinning against God and other people.  I was in a place where I prayed, though, asking for forgiveness for the sins that caught my attention because I was caught  doing them, or because my life was suffering so obviously from them.  Mostly, I was aware of my sin through the eyes of other people who reacted to the sins or the results of those sins.

The beginning of dealing with temptation was in confession.  Looking back and regretting my actions was where I started much of my prayer life.  It wasn't that I was never thankful or did not give honor to God, but my love and appreciation were never very deep in my life as long as I was dealing with temptation on the tail end, after I had sinned.

I write about this as past, not because I do not ever deal with temptation this way any more, but because I have found other ways of dealing with temptation through prayer other than confessing and repenting of sins I commit.  It began with the great desire to be free from certain sins and the temptations that precede them.  Confessing becomes tiring and insincere when I do not long to be free from such sins in my life.  Instead of giving up and calling my sins inevitable, I began to seek for other ways out of this stage of prayer and my life with God.

Teresa is right about the devil resisting this move.  Certainly my own flesh - my natural abilities - were so used to giving in that temptation seemed insurmountable.  One of the works of the devil that Jesus came to destroy (1 John 3:8)  was flesh, that is, reliance on my own natural abilities apart from God.  Satan tempts me to work on my own, either rationalizing my sins or fighting against them with all my might.  Either way I fail, because I feed the flesh and desire rather than strengthening my resolve to wait on God and humbly do as he says.

This is why Teresa's advice about gentle prayer rings so true for me.  She uses another word as well: "recollection."  This is recalling the thoughts and feelings of God at the time of temptation.  It can be memorized scripture, familiar hymns, the cross, the feeling of God's presence, or just getting back to work.  Such "recollection" mixed with asking God for help provide another way out of temptation rather than confession.  So when temptation comes as a thought and an inclination to sin, I can redirect my mind toward God through recollection and asking for his help.  This made me aware of how temptation precedes sins in my life and needs to be monitored closely.  "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation." (Matthew 26:41)

I found quickly that "parroting" a prayer or Bible verse does not amount to recollection or prayer.  Such things cannot be used like magic to adjust the faults I am particularly ashamed of.  They are part of a larger life that goes on when I am not being tempted.  If my mind is filled with thoughts and feelings that quickly lead to temptation and sin, then a little song or Bible verse or even prayer will not change my direction easily or consistently.  I found that I needed thoughts and feelings about God that were at least as compelling and powerful as the other thoughts and feelings I was having.  Guilt was not enough.  It often worked against me.  Instead I needed joy and peace in God himself.


What I found was that prayer and recollection involve many aspects of my life.  I cannot get fixed without being changed.  This is why in order to leave behind the "earlier stages" of prayer and life with God, I needed to become aware of my temptations and sins enough to realize that they are not momentary lapses, but indicative of how my life is lived, of what inhabits my thoughts and feelings, of what my body is prepared to do without thinking, and of how distracted and confused are the depths of my being.  I pulled on the string of my momentary lapses and found a spider web of connections throughout my whole life.

Now I am learning about another way to fight temptation and grow in my life with God.  I have not left confession or recollection and prayer behind, but have found that they lay the foundation for something else.  This is doing all things in a "spirit of prayer."

I had thought I could jump to this after reading some about it and skip or do without confession, recollection, and prayer, but have found instead that these actions point to something all-pervasive and all-encompassing that I need in my life.  Teresa is right in saying that I have to start at the beginning.  It is starting with prayer and continuing on with it.  Confession begins this journey.  Recollection and petition sustain it.  The goal of it is "abiding" with God, as John puts it (John 15), or having the "spirit of prayer," according to Teresa.

I am writing mostly about what I have heard and read and not so much experienced here.  In the realm of temptation, this kind of prayer brings a person to a place where it does not evil does not even occur to them.  As Dallas Willard puts it, "A person is only as good as what doesn't enter their minds."  (paraphrase)  Obviously, this is not to be free from temptation, since Jesus himself was not free from it.  Rather it is to have it be far less frequent because of what the mind is occupied with.  Satan can intrude with thoughts of temptation, but often these would be discarded as uninteresting or ludicrous.

I know there are some temptations that have always seemed that way to me.  For myself, getting drunk has never been a temptation for me.  Although the thought was there, there was hardly any inclination.  It never really "made sense" to me.  I have seen some things for which I have a strong inclination begin to fade because of what I am interested in, dedicated to, and hoping for in my life.

Occasionally, the thoughts and actions that help me resist may be very mundane things, but mostly, they have had to be charged with love in order to stand up to temptation.  What I mean is that temptation is fixed on my own desire apart from the good of God and everyone else.  When love begins to take root, I choose God and his goodness more than what I want and so the inclination of temptation decreases.  Only love is strong enough to thwart my desires, which are strengthened by my flesh, teased by the devil, and imposed by the peer pressure of this world.  Love must be separated from desire and be understood as "willing what is good."  Such love is what I really need and truly desire more than merely getting what I want.

I see that how I have worked with temptation indicates where I am in my walk with God.  If the main place I deal with temptation is through confession, then I am just starting.  Moving forward from this place begins with the desire to overcome temptation.  This is brought about by God's grace.  He makes me aware of my need.

The next "stage" is one where I respond to temptation before I sin through direct means.  I recollect and pray in the face of temptation.  This is a huge step and is accompanied by a lot of resistance.  For this reason, it is easy to give up and go back to just confessing.  This is the only way to fail.  By moving forward, I believe I am guaranteed victory, since God wants me to draw near to him and be free from sin.  Giving up indicates what I think about God.

Finally, recollection and prayer start to become ingrained as habits and desires, so that there is much less room for temptation in the mind and much less inclination for temptation in the body.  Instead of being the central focus, whether as an object of desire or an object of guilt and hatred, temptation becomes less interesting and "slips the mind" due to the fascination and delight in God and his work.

Lord, I write and write, but I feel that I can never quite explain what it is to be near you and say, "How precious to me are your thoughts, O God; how vast the sum of them!"  I enjoy the research that people like Teresa have performed and recorded in what it is to walk with you.  May I learn and grow as they did.  Amen.


I meant to be more short and sweet with this, but I ended up outlining my life and struggle with temptation.  As usual, I am short on concrete examples, so I end up swimming in abstractions.  However, this was very important as I realize more of what temptation is and how I can deal with it so that God might be who I want to be with as well as who I want to be like.

Virtue and Perseverance

Devotional Classics, Teresa of Avila, Excerpts from Interior Castle

I feel I must repeat this important point: at the beginning we must not become content with the consolations we may receive at the early stages [of prayer].  That would be like building our house on sand.  At this stage you are beginning to build a beautiful castle, and you must build it on strong virtues, not on temporary consolations.  Neither should we complain about a lack of consolation at this stage.  Rather embrace the Cross which Jesus bore upon his shoulders and realize that this Cross is yours to carry too.  We are free in the same measure we are able to suffer. (p. 198)

If then, you sometimes fall, so not lose heart.  Even more, do not cease striving to make progress from it, for even out of your fall God will bring some good. . . .  Our sins can have the effect of leading us back to God and striving all the more.  (p.198)

 The only way to overcome temptation and sin is through perseverance.  Do not give up!  This is the difference between marriage and divorce, heroes and villains, joy and apathy.  When overcoming becomes a habit, trials and temptations bring joy.  (James 1:1)

Teresa explains the temptation to give up by using an allegory.  She describes the various stages of coming to know God by using the image of a castle with many rooms.  As a person grows, he moves from one room to another.  Not persevering leads to remaining in a room or even leaving the castle of knowing God altogether.

Three things can keep me from persevering: consolation, desolation, and temptation.  The first is early success.  Teresa's "consolations" are times in which God shows up and often dramatically.  "Mountain-top" spiritual experiences are wonderful, but trap me because I am tempted to go back to find them.  There is nothing wrong with enjoying powerful experiences with God, but as C. S. Lewis says, the most dangerous word here is, "Encore!"

I love how Teresa ties this with building my life ("house") on sand.  My experience of God's goodness fluctuates for many reasons.  The sure foundation is not a particular kind of experience with God, but a particular kind of character in myself from being with God.  That character is called virtuous.  It is when the goodness of God begins to form in my habits and daily living.  That is the "rock" to build life on: obedience to Christ's commands by his strength.

The reason I become trapped by consolations is because I value the experience more than the growth in character and virtue that I may obtain through such an experience.  Consolations are inevitable in a walk with a God who longs to satisfy the desires of my heart.  I have to hold them lightly, though.  The thought that helps me let them go is realizing that the best is yet to come.  Perseverance is letting go of such consolations because of the desire to press "onward and upward" into being good more than just experiencing good.

The second barrier to perseverance comes from "desolations."  This is a lack of consolation.  Desert times, dry spells, and boredom show up in desolation.  Spiritual aridity causes many people to turn back in their walk with God.  I find that I may wonder if I took a wrong turn somewhere and try to review and relive past experiences in order to find God's consolation.  "Encore" again.

I have come through these times of desolation by not giving in to fear.  Even if I don't sense him, God is near and will not abandon me.  Even if I have taken a wrong turn, the best thing to do when lost is to stay put.  Wait on God for rescue from these times in the wilderness.  Usually, I find that he continues to grant consolations in these times, but they are quieter and more easily over looked.  Instead of an ocean of joy and power I may sense in a spiritually "high" moment, I am treated with a small oasis of hope or peace.  It is no wonder that these "small" consolations can be even more meaningful that "big" ones just because of where they occur - in the desert.  The contrast heightens their force.

My worst sins creep out in times of desolation.  The desire to elicit feeling - any feeling - is strong when the days seem gray and God, far away.  This is where fear comes in and where my faith and trust is God is tested.  He usually comes relatively quickly, within and hour or two of my cry for help and often immediately.  He grants small assurances of his presence and love that point to better times with him.  Remembering his faithfulness helps a lot more than aching for better times and experiences.

Finally, temptation wears away at perseverance.  Temptations come as thoughts with an inclination or desire to fulfill the thoughts.  When such thoughts are harbored or acted upon, they become sin.  Before the action or the holding on to the temptation, it is not sin, just temptation.  These can be overcome.

The best way to overcomes them is to have other thoughts.  I need to fill my mind with other things than the thoughts that are tempting.  With this thoughts may come, but usually they are without much inclination because my attention is focused elsewhere.

Second best is to turn from such thoughts immediately when they occur.  The stronger my inclination, the quicker I have to turn away from such thoughts.  This is where memorized sections of the Bible come into play.  Also hymns and songs of praise can help divert my mind away from temptation.  Also rather mundane activities like good work and good play can redirect my mind toward God and his goodness.

Finally, the last way to overcome temptation is to confess when I have been overcome and strive to make progress from it.  Although this last way seems like defeat, it is only defeat if I let it discourage me enough to give up or deny that I have sinned.  As hard as it is, confession is best practiced with a another trusted person who can remind me of God's love and forgiveness.  In the face of failure, I need forgiveness to be able to make any progress from my sin.  Other people can speak through the hurt, emptiness, and self-doubt I may have when I am in a "failure mode."

Recently, I gave into a temptation that plagues me.  Filled with self-hatred and fear, I could not see a way out without the help of another person.  Sometimes I need help even to cry out to God.  From this I learned about spiritual death.  Such death contains a never-ending amount of self-hatred, or "weeping and gnashing of teeth" to use the metaphor.  It is to be caught in such a place with no hope of escape.  Self-hatred yields self-destruction, whether slow or fast.  Self-hatred is one of the indicators of giving up and lacking perseverance.  In this case, I was given a new thought and motivation to help me stay away from temptation.

I see how consolations, "desolations," and temptations can become barriers to perseverance.  The only way out is to develop a virtuous character under God's guiding, graceful hand.  Here is how Jesus put it:

While a large crowd was gathering and people were coming to Jesus from town after town, he told this parable: “A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path; it was trampled on, and the birds of the air ate it up. Some fell on rock, and when it came up, the plants withered because they had no moisture. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up with it and choked the plants. Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up and yielded a crop, a hundred times more than was sown.” When he said this, he called out, “He who has ears to hear, let him hear . . .”

“This is the meaning of the parable: The seed is the word of God. Those along the path are the ones who hear, and then the devil comes and takes away the word from their hearts [desolation], so that they may not believe and be saved  Those on the rock are the ones who receive the word with joy when they hear it [consolation], but they have no root [character]. They believe for a while, but in the time of testing they fall away.  The seed that fell among thorns stands for those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by life’s worries, riches and pleasures, [temptations] and they do not mature. But the seed on good soil stands for those with a noble and good heart [virtuous character], who hear the word, retain it, and by persevering produce a crop. (Luke 8:4-15)

Lord, grant me a noble and good heart that thinks on you above all else and hears you, that stays with you even when bored or discouraged, and that perseveres through all sorts of temptations, even when I fall to them.  Let me be an overcomer and not give up!  Amen.

Like so many things in life, the key to success in a life with God is just showing up and not giving up.  By God's grace and mercy, we can do it.

Virtue and Temptation

Devotional Classics, Thomas a Kempis, The Imitation of Christ

"Many have tried to escape  temptations only to find that they more grievously fall into them.  We cannot win this battle by running away alone; the key to victory is true humility and patience; in them we overcome the enemy.  If we merely turn away from temptation outwardly and do not strike at the root, we will make very little progress.  In fact, you will find that the temptations will return more quickly and powerfully, and you will feel even worse.  Little by little, through patient endurance of spirit (with the help of God), you will win a better victory than by your own determination.  The beginning of all evil temptations is an unstable mind and a small trust in God."  (p.185)

The trouble with temptation is that "wherever you go, there you are."  Temptation lives in my desire and I take my desire with me wherever I go.  It is a thought accompanied by a sense of pleasure.  These occur with some regularity throughout my day.

One relief is that temptation is not in itself wrong.  My will has not been brought to bear.  I have not made a choice. . . yet.  When I mistake temptation for sin, I live a defeated life and misunderstand the nature of spiritual growth and salvation.  I will not be saved from temptation in this life, any more than Jesus was.  However, like Jesus and in his company, I can hope to overcome temptation.

Although temptation is a thought and a feeling and the fight against temptation is within my mind, the victory against temptation is found elsewhere.  Victory against temptation is found in the heart.  I am tempted because of a "small trust is God" and a lack of "true humility and patience."  The orientation of the heart is what strengthens or weakens temptation.  The less I trust God and yield to his desires and goodness, the less I am willing to wait on him to save me from my troubles, the greater temptations will become.  Conversely, the more I trust God and delight in what he delights in and rely on him for help, the more temptations move into the realm of passing thoughts with no appeal.

Without my cry to God, I am working "in the flesh," that is, by my own ability and determination.  This is bound to fail.  It does not hit the root of the matter, but ends up merely pruning the branches of the temptation and making it grow larger.  What I mean is that the more I rely on my own determination to fight temptation, the less I rely on God and trust in him, and then find that the temptation grows in strength because it grows where there is little trust in God.  I may find that I exchange one behavior for another, but root of pride and self-reliance remains which gives temptation its strength.

So I cannot run away from temptation.  Neither can I fight temptation directly with my own "will-power."  Instead I must face temptation and endure it, not by focusing on it, but by calling out to God for help and salvation and waiting on him.  I fight the temptation in the battlefield of my mind by learning how to continually focus on God in his goodness and in what he desires.  Temptation indicates where I have wavered in my attention on God.

In this way temptations can serve me.  I can find the places and times in my life where I lose track of God.  (The Prayer of Examen is helpful for this.  See http://messagescraps.blogspot.com/2011/08/prayer-of-examen-examined.html)  Temptation is, at its heart, forgetting God.  The kinds of thoughts and feelings and the where and when I have them inform me of my weaknesses.  "Temptations reveal our instability and our lack of trust in God; temptations reveal who we are.  That is why we must pay attention to them."  Humility and patience are the willingness and desire to bring God into those areas of my life, so that he is all in all.  

Basically, I need to learn how to have his desires, the desire for good, at the center of my life instead of my own desires a the center.  I trust that if I seek God's interests and desires, he will richly supply my own in his way and in his time.  Instead of all thoughts and choices going through the "Do I want to?" filter first, I need to bring them through the "Is this God's good?" filter first.

I am tempted to neglect work at times.  I find that when faced with certain tasks, I have a feeling of boredom or even frustration.  I have been learning to submit to such work because I anticipate that God will take such things, even if they seem unimportant, and create patience and kindness and endurance in me through them.  When things are particularly difficult I call out for help and God comes quickly most times.  I am learning that trusting God is doing these tasks out of love and service to him, knowing that he is my "boss" and will take care of my wants and needs.  Trusting God enables me to change my thoughts about the work and then my feelings follow.

I could change my thoughts about the work in other ways, without trusting God, but instead relying on "positive thinking" or pride in being a good worker.  These attitudes take the work I do and build up my trust in my own abilities apart from God, what is called "the flesh" in the Bible.  Unfortunately, as I build up the pride in my flesh, which leads to greater desire towards pleasing myself and looking good to impress other people.  In the end, this strengthens the temptation to be bored or frustrated at work, because my flesh growls about not being satisfied or appreciated.

With God as my trust, the boredom and frustration are replaced with joy in seeing God work in and through my work to increase humility and endurance in my life as well as blessing other people with my work and my attitude.  The growling of my flesh for satisfaction or appreciation becomes quieter in the pleasure of seeing God honored and pleased and other people blessed and encouraged to serve God in their own lives, even in small ways.

Lord, as temptations come my way today, let me think on you and call out to you.  Let me not be afraid, but excited that through overcoming temptation.  "Peace is not found by escaping temptations, but by being tried by them.  We will discover peace when we have been tried and come through the trial of temptation."  You are my strength and my hope.  Amen.

I want to work more on the "tail end" of temptation.  I want to be able to use temptation to further my walk with God.  I see that through temptation, I can become aware of my weakness and where I need God more in my life.  Also, I can see where the flesh has more sway to complain by seeing where I crave satisfaction and appreciation most.  I want to be mindful of this.  Only in this will virtue become implanted in my life in the places I need it most instead of in places where I will be tempted to make a show of it.